This last week I wrote about checking in with your body after eating in order to start listening to what it was telling you about the affects of the food you ate.
If there is anything about being seriously gluten intolerant to be thankful for, it’s that it has really made me more vigilant, more self inquiring and present with how food affects my body and consequently my health. But still there are days when it’s so freaken hard, you guys.
I’m losing interest in food that very obviously makes me sick. I’ve turned a corner where feeling healthier is more important than say… sneaking a croissant, because they are SO GOOD.
How many times can you eat something, get horribly sick and regret it? It can be humbling, let me tell you.
But on the whole, practice is paying off and owning the value of my body and my health has creating huge shifts in this arena.
Here’s where it’s hard though:
I’ve mentioned in various places that I have a super duper favorite breakfast cafe that I hang out at a few times a week. The food is great, the coffee is fantastic, 90% of the wait staff knows my order and place it the second they see me walk in through the door and it’s just lovely. Especially when it’s raining outside.
Eating at home with well chosen ingredients, I’m able to remain gluten free. The risks come when I eat out. For the last few weeks, even though I feel totally fine after having breakfast there, each and every following morning I wake up with a distinct arthritic ache in my two index fingers. This is typically a symptom for me of having ingested gluten, but it could also be sugar. Mama can’t have coffee without two packs of sugar.
So I’m caught up in this dilemma. I need to check in and see if this restaurant adds flour to their hash browns and if they do I have to alter my order. It’s not a big deal, but I’m so attached to having the same thing every time I go there. Rituals give me comfort, a sense of place and satisfaction. It’s kind of funny to me now as I type this, that I’d have such a hard time with the idea of just changing my order if there is something in the dish that is harming me.
The truth is that having a gluten intolerance has made it so precarious to eat out anywhere. Having a place to go to regularly without having to worry or give what I’m eating a second thought has been an enormously nourishing experience. Nourishing to my sense of ease, safety and again, comfort. I forget how dodging allergens at every turn can be so draining. It’s a constant concern that keeps me vigilant all the time.
Just processing through this helps. I’m going to go in there next time and just talk to the chef. If there isn’t any flour or obvious cross contamination, I’ll stop adding sugar to my coffee and see what affects that has on my body. It’s good practice in learning exactly what my body needs and doesn’t need in order to function optimally, so in this way, I can look at it as a positive instead of a loss.
Have a great Sunday everyone! Until next time.